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15 minute writing timer. Ready. Set. Go. Know when to say “when.” Be aware of your limits. Tap out. Tonight, I’m on the edge of tapping out and just going to bed. But, I’m also unsure that I really need to, so I’ll use my go-to inquiry for times like these: “Do I have what it takes continue, right now?” How about now? And, now? How about now? It’s a simple inquiry. Riding a 100+ mile bike race off of the couch: Can I pedal one more stroke? Yup. How about one more? Yup. This one? Yup…. In the post-traumatic brain injury days of waking up for the 1000th+ night with burning ringing in my ears, piercing migraines, and extreme nausea: Can I be with life in this moment? Do I have what it takes? Yup. Now? Yeah. How about now? Yup. Recently, as I am doing breath holding work: Can I be with the body as it experiences this discomfort? Yup? Now? Yup. Now? Nope. Can I be with my body as it is and listen to its wisdom? Yeah. Time to tap out. By far, the most courageous moments in my life, the ones that required the most strength, the ones that required the most will power were the moments when listening to wisdom meant tapping out. We’re all going to tap out at some point. Each of us will experience a last breath and it will always be an exhale. A giving up. A letting go. A surrendering. A relinquishing. A returning. A releasing. A stopping. A tapping out. Tonight, I’m finishing a day full of teaching, discussing, reading student writing, holding student writing conferences, spending time with family, walking dogs, engaging with the handpan community, texting friends, talking to friends on the phone, doing deep work on myself as I engage my will power and stay true to my intentions to stay awake in life, holding my breath, bathing in ice water, meditating, recording and editing yoga nidra sessions, planning future events, and so on. I’m about tapped out. And, it feels good. It feels good to know that there will be a moment where wisdom will say, “That’s enough, Dave. Well-done. Rest. Tap on out.” And that moment is now. I’ll let Lorin Roche finish this off. “When sleep has not yet come, And the sweet buzz of exhaustion Permeates the body, Linger in the ahhhh of relief As your head touches the pillow. Everything in you is yearning to let go. So let go, let your body fall Into something deeper than sleep. With your mind, enter The soft luminous glow of the soul” (Roche, Lorin. The Radiance Sutras. 2014) Time.